Golden Goose

I am not a coward. I am not ashamed of what I feel.

It is easy for me to speak of how I feel, or what I believe in. Or maybe I just do it to throw everyone off track of who I really am, and what I’m really thinking. You can’t take my word for it – just a friendly reminder of things most of is tend to forget on and off in the sprawl of life.

While I do love to indulge in the occasional intoxicated nights jabbering about with random men on Heinz factories and specialty Primanti Bros sandwiches in Pittsburgh, life has evolved for me. Everyday, I am less scared of a though that has maybe haunted me for a long time. I am less scared of being alone.

Life is becoming a good book, a photograph and a plateful of rice. Life is a glass of cold water, selling all your belongings. Life is to fly to Europe, to make a piggy bank and smile at the stranger. Life is becoming about doing, not believing.

There was a time I had faith. That time is gone. I don’t know what time it is now, but I know it is moving towards incredulity. There is my horizon stuck in night and day, and the breeze of an upcoming fall makes me feel alive. Life is a lot of things, but it is only what you want it to be…cluttered perhaps, or complicated… or just an indefinite wait on the sidewalk of good doings. Here you sit breathing in misfortune, while the golden goose walks by unnoticed. Ahh, the irony… and Ohh, the simplicity :)…

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