Party of One

I believe the primary cause behind unhappiness is the idea that life is supposed to be lived a certain way.

A few days ago, I was dining at a restaurant I really adore and celebrating my birthday. A woman sitting next to my table kept staring at me for a long while, after which she finally scooted over and asked me to join her table, where her family of some sort was seated. While I did find her gesture awfully generous, a part of me also felt slightly enraged.

I must put out here that I am a woman of very high pride and yes in certain circumstances I must admit I will sell my soul to the devil before I have to cocksuck to anyone. I personally feel there is nothing “sad” or pitiful about having a meal alone but something about that woman’s sympathetic smile just really pissed me off. I asked her what makes her think I need company, to which she gave an expression resembling half horror and half astonishment. I suppose they both are quite similar in nature except the combo is completely sensational I tell you.

It then reminded me of a time when I believed in a the template lifestyle so strongly. It also reminded me how I was once in the woman’s position and observed a man eat dinner alone sitting at a restaurant with someone very close to me. While of course I wasn’t stupid enough to actually go over and offer him to sit with us, I did feel moved enough to ask the person I was having dinner with never to dine alone, and “FaceTime” me even if I’m not around. Repeating this incident to myself makes me chuckle so hard. I guess we are all growing, some just faster than others :)…

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